I felt frantic, and I wondered if my career concerns were legitimate. Was I just being ungrateful? Did I have a bad attitude? What was it? I sensed things about my work, but it was very difficult to sort through the day-to-day of my job and my overall career.
I didn’t feel organized. I would island hop between issues. This had been going on for years. I’d never done due diligence on my career decisions. I went from one thing to the next like I was supposed too. I regretted that, but was still responsible for being where I was. I felt a lot of confusion and some anger. I was was tired of being confused.
There were all these things going on. There were frustrating things in my day-to-day. There was a sense of life misalignment, and I was worried about it, which bothered me the most. I really like things aligned in my personal life. I felt I had neglected my career. How did I let things get so misaligned? It was very bothersome.
I didn’t feel I knew how to go about changing things though. Thinking through the implications of my career choices was something I’d never done before. I felt I was missing some tool sets.
I now know this is unreasonable, but I wanted the answer. I wanted to know with certainty that this was the definitive answer that makes sense for me. Thinking there’s an answer actually holds you back more because it puts more pressure on the situation, like, you better do it right.
I was most concerned that I was wasting my life and talents and that I was wasting time when I could be happier somewhere else.
Nothing was the Same as a Personal Coach
I would look through other degree programs and fantasize about going back to school. I’d get books to work through, like Pathfinder and Do What You Are. I didn’t find anything compelling though. I dabbled with random professional networking and volunteering.
The difference between reading a book and working with a coach is that a book has a built in premise for how things are working. It’s inherently limiting because you’re self-diagnosing yourself.
I got a promotion, which added more stress than usual to my life. Despite having a promotion, I still didn’t feel like I was where I wanted to be.
I wanted to deal with where I was and get somewhere else doing a certain collection of things to make it happen.
New Base of Stability
The coaching work set me up on a much better foundation. I had a path to deal with both the long term choices of my career direction and the day-to-day career stuff. It was a mental shift. I feel more empowered and much less frantic. I have a better understanding of what’s going on in my career and a foundation for how to think about things moving forward.
I’m not in a different job, in part because of what makes sense for me and my newly growing family, but the coaching was still hugely valuable for me.
I’m a deliberate person, so I do need time to work things through at my own pace. The coaching work cleared the fog of the landscape. I’m less judgemental about where I am. I’m more comfortable. I see more clearly, but don’t have complete certainty because that’s not really available in real life. I wanted the questions to go away. Now I allow them. I’m totally good with it.
I’m in such a better place and so much better equipped for future situations. Working with the Cardy Career Coaching team was a huge help.